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It's Not Just Business, It's Personal!

From personal anecdotes, to business development case scenarios, and all the thoughts in between, Monica shares her insights into what brings success and happiness "when business meets personal."

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Strengths and Weaknesses.  We all have them.  To some extent they are in-born to your personality type but that doesn’t mean you can’t do anything about it.  I use the Peoplemap System to help identify clients’ strengths and weaknesses (AKA Achilles heels), and use it as a personal development platform for future growth.

I propose that our Achilles heels are often a result of the extreme of our strengths. Case in point: developing relationships is really important to me, and some of my strengths include being personal, compassionate, and encouraging of others. I enjoy giving praise, mentoring, and seeing others grow.  I like to build a personal relationship, even in professional settings.  To an extreme, I can be overly dependent on being accepted or praised by others- I’m too sensitive and can take things personally.

Another strength is being positive, some would call me a PollyAnna (a character in an old children’s movie who professed to find the good in everyone and everything). “You’re such a Pollyanna” can also be a criticism, because if I’m always looking at or for the good, maybe I’m not being critical enough or demanding better from myself and others.  I let myself and others off the hook too easily- also known as not being accountable (which is tough when you’ve got specific goals to reach).

Another cause for a weakness is to lack a certain skill, such as assertiveness, initiative, and persistence.  I used to be terrible at being assertive, speaking up for myself or others when I sensed that it could cause conflict.  I, like many people I know, avoid conflict.  As I said, I’ve gotten better at it. I sense the fear and do it anyway (usually!).  When have you wanted to say something but didn’t?  What repercussions has it had in your life?  My experience is that it usually prolongs the inevitable and causes pain or confusion rather than clarity and authentic communication.

I was giving a Peoplemap workshop in a small company that was owned and mostly run by women who had developed a culture of conflict avoidance at work.  (Some admitted to being like that at home too).  On the surface they all got along, but behind doors they judged and criticized how some staffers did things.  The owner was  a good leader in many ways, but even she avoided conflict.  The employees were able to give many examples of how avoiding conflict was doing harm to the company- inter-personally among the staff and with the clients.

How would you score yourself on the following 8 Core Competencies of Leadership* ? I’ve listed them as two ends of the same communication focus:

Assertiveness VS Active Listening

Constructive Feedback VS Praise, Recognition and Quality Time

Initiation VS Collaboration

Accountability VS Mentoring

Most people live at one end of the scale or the other.  The best leaders can incorporate all of these competencies.

If you’d like more information about the Peoplemap Leadership training, please contact me: This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.

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Posted by on in Personal Awareness

I love this quote:

The secret of making something work in your lives is, first of all, the deep desire to make it work; then the faith and belief that it can work; then to hold that clear definite vision in your consciousness and see it working out step by step, without one doubt or disbelief.

Eileen Caddy

Do you desire success, however you might define that?  Do you even KNOW what that looks like?  Do you believe that it can happen to you?  

Our inner thoughts really do make a difference on our ultimate success, so it's worth spending your time noticing; are you a believer or a disbeliever?

Self-doubt is a toxin that creeps into your dreams, your relationships, your career, your finances, and even your health. If you are often filled with self-doubt, telling yourself things like, "that's going to be too hard, they won't take notice, they will find a reason to say no, maybe I'll do it another way next time when I'm ready",  then you'll never be ready and you'll never manifest what you want.

The Gremlin of self-doubt IS something you can manage by noticing, by talking him or her away with positive thoughts, and by doing things in baby steps, consistently building on what you are confident in until your comfort zone is bigger and bigger.


I do an exercise with my clients called Hi-Dream, Low-Dream.  Self-doubt drives the low dream or worst case scenario. Flush it out.  What are all your fears. The high dream is your best case scenario; everything you dream or wish could happen.  If you examine what REALITY supports each of these dreams, you will usually see that there is a better case for the high dream coming true than the low dream.  Just examining it in a logical way can build your belief. 

Once you believe your dream is possible, your mind can create a path to make it happen and keep you motivated to see it through.  This is exactly how I lost 40 pounds.  I found a tool, educated myself, and most of all, I finally believed that I could do it- even at my age (55).  The same concepts can be applied to personal, business, or relationship goals.

Now go out there and dream big, flush out your Gremlins so they can't hide, and talk yourself into believing.  If you need help, I'm always here.

 

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Posted by on in Business Vision

 

The road to success is paved with more than just good intentions; it is paved with the specific and prioritized stepping-stones that take you from a dream to reality and mortared together with confident perspectives that keep you motivated and in action.  If you took a minute to write down 3 goals you'd like to achieve this year, what would they be?  Do you plan to pursue them or put them on the back burner?  Where is your business headed and are you at the helm or is fate the driver?

 

Spending time defining your dream work and life situation will give you the clues to what you want to focus on.  This vision will give you the best framework if it includes more than the typical business model; how about the hours you want to work, the people you want to work with and the way you do business?  What do you want to be known for?  Are you doing everything yourself or are you affiliating with other businesses or delegating and mentoring key people to help your business grow?  Are you setting up systems to make room for growth and to work efficiently?  Creating a business model based on how you want to grow will allow you the room to grow with YOU in control.

 


Take some time to write out your vision for the next year or two and you will see the necessary goals that will become your focus.  Some examples might include:

  • New client sources
  • Increased business generated from existing clients (repeats and referrals)
  • New businesses to network/affiliate with
  • Professional events to participate in or attend
  • Packages to offer your clients such as Silver, Gold, and Platinum services
  • Print marketing materials; update your logo, copy or offers
  • Multiple streams of income
  • And don't forget to make time for your personal goals- exercise, family time, new skill development

If you'd like more help defining the goals that will ROCK your business this year and keep you at the helm, please join us for a free conference call on March 7, from noon to 1pm Eastern Time.  This call is specifically for wedding industry business owners.  Please email Monica to sign in and get the call-in information.

This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.

See full class invite on the events and classes page.

 

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